How many times has a man tried to tell me who I really am and how I should feel? How many times have they lost it when I rejected their bullshit and showed them my boundaries? Often enough to make me a fucking expert on the subject.
I’m intimately familiar with claims that when I say no it’s abuse, and when I refuse to back down to their aggression, I’m victimizing them. That withholding my support and validation is destroying their lives. Typically these claims are shouted from close range, with balled fists and red faces.
That’s why I have this weird deja vu about some of the men who identify as women. Actually I don’t care how they identify. But wait — not caring is not an option. I have to loudly admire their choice, or I’m being abusive. I have to center their needs in my…
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